We Tapped That Ass

I banged you here
I nailed you there
And on this couch
And in this chair

In the doorway, the hallway, on every stair
We tapped that ass all over this house
Sometimes him
Sometimes me

Though never simultaneously
But one of us was hittin' it usually
We tapped that ass all over this house

You'll never escape us
'Cause we live in your head
Just two swell dudes
That you screwed

Here
And here
And there
And here
And even occasionally in your bed

That bed is really uncomfortable
Right? It's like a prison cot
On the stove
Over the sink

And sort of in the fridge one time, I think
And then we hit the back patio
That's where we hit your back pati
Oh!

We tapped that ass all over this house
How many times did we tap that behind?
Well, let's estimate
On an average day
I would have to say

Mmm, 5, 6, 7, 8
What, too cheeky?
Hey, does this ring a bell?
A little to the left

Oh, oh, okay now, a little to the right
Oh, oh, oh, wait, wait
Back to the left

Right there, right there

Wait, no
You're doing it wrong
I'll do it myself

Barkeep, what's on tap?
It's me, and my ass
Ooh, sounds refreshing
On the table you were
Willing and able

On the ottoman
You took a lot of man
And on the safe in the closet
I made a deposit
I also tapped that ass all over this house

Let's wrap this up with a big finish
But where should we finish?
Please, not on my chest
No, you'll scratch it

On the accent wall
On the bathroom floor
You didn't care where
You just wanted more

How much more tapping could one ass endure?

We tapped that ass (tapped that ass)
Tapped that ass (tapped that ass)
We tapped that ass
All over this house